I know borderlines quite well and went into this intentionally. She is the needy type so jumping into a relationship right away was perfectly ok with her and not beta at all. I am an older guy and she is 15 years younger and fairly fit but really looks 20 years younger so of course i am gonna go for it.
In my somewhat limited but quite eventful 26 years of experience, as a person with BPD, the way to make it work with that person is always communication. Some people pull away for space, which is possibly the hardest thing for us to take. Some time off can bring a new perspective and level your head, so be sure to use it.
When the person with BPD feels abandoned, they can become abusive or controlling as a way to defend against feelings of abandonment or feeling unworthy. However, this is not a reason to allow the person you love with BPD to manipulate or abuse you. Still set your limits and stick to them, but in a loving and nonjudgmental way.
It may be soon or it may be months down the line. And you’re going to be like wait a minute, where is this down to earth girl I fell in love with? The person she’s showing you now is a reflection of you, because she lacks a stable inner self. She mirrors what she senses you want and need.
Can a person with borderline personality disorder feel love?
Research has confirmed that people with BPD tend to have very stormy romantic relationships characterized by a great deal of turmoil and dysfunction. When you love someone who lives with a mental health condition like borderline personality disorder, it can present scenarios you may not be used to. Please note that everything in this post is anecdotal and should not be taken as professional advice. These are based on my own experiences as someone living with borderline personality disorder.
How to break up with someone who has borderline personality disorder?
This interaction illustrates how BPD can cause a married couple to go from passionately loving to alienation in a matter of minutes. Relationships generally don’t change that quickly, particularly when one party is asleep. More likely these changes are due to instability in Jasmine’s view of the relationship. The intensity of the intimacy felt during passion with her husband induced fears of abandonment, which prompted her to wake Brett and confront him.
Enlist the help of a couple’s therapist
As long as you ALWAYS have a non-attached attitude towards her, she will always be yours. That’s truly the only way to keep these women. So when she isn’t responsive, just let her go. Much easier said than done of course which is why I have A LOT of training about this. Either way, just see how things are 3 months from now.
Let’s explore what to expect in BPD relationships. Dysfunctional relationship compared to a healthy one. © 2023 Healthline Media LLC. All rights reserved. Our website services, content, and products are for informational purposes only. Healthline Media does not provide medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Healthline has strict sourcing guidelines and relies on peer-reviewed studies, academic research institutions, and medical associations.
That’s how 21-year-old Mae felt when she was told earlier this year that she had borderline personality disorder – and it’s a sentiment shared on social media by many others with that diagnosis. Therefore, borderline personality disorder dating can feel immensely different in the beginning, middle, and end of the relationship. Borderline personality disorder relationships break up can be especially ugly. Someone with BPD may feel very isolated because of their past. Offer your partner understanding and patience.
Another common misconception is that borderline personality disorder is permanent. Many people with BPD were exposed to stressful childhood experiences, such as abandonment, adversity, abuse and neglect. Other people with BPD may have also been exposed to unstable, invalidating and hostile relationships.
It’s the BPD at work, not their true feelings. One of the key signs you’re dating someone with BPD is dramatic mood swings. One minute they’re demanding your attention, and the next they just want to be left alone.
For once, you may truly feel like someone’s hero or heroine. When the relationship begins, your significant other with BPD might tell you repeatedly how you are the only person who has completely understood them. Switching between idealizing the favorite person and devaluing the favorite person, in the matter of seconds.
My boyfriend and I fight all the time and I think it’s mostly my fault for not setting boundaries early on. We have broken up a couple times but only more recently have I been thinking seriously about making this permanent. He has lived with me on and off for most of our relationship and hasn’t had a job since we’ve been together. He has had occasional days here and there DatingReport and has been very eager to work when it comes up so I do believe he is trying. When we fight about this – usually after me asking him to do some housework – he will hurl abuse at me before storming off for a day or two. I have made it clear I do not like this behaviour and he doesn’t usually insult me as much now, although has the occasional relapse, like today.
While you sound like a good person in general, you will only hurt yourself by caving into your emotional desires at this time. If your partner has BPD and sometimes you feel like you can’t take it any longer, don’t despair! We’ve prepared some helpful advice to overcome the challenges BPD poses and have a lasting relationship with the person you love.
